i don’t know why it took me so long to realise the link haha. the link between choices and this. yea we don’t wake up one day and just fall out of love. but we can wake up and decide to stop trying and that’s where the end begins.
okay random realisation aside, i just flunked and passed two of my midterms both with flying colours :)) probably getting a 100% for maths and a 10% for soci :)) also there’s the 2400 word js paper that is due in 22 hours which i haven’t started on :))
still deciding whether i should start work at wild honey cos apparently make up on the job is compulsory. i wonder who’s the dick who decided that girls need make up to look proper.
forgiving is really the best feeling in the world haha. hate it when people tell me to get over it. i’m gonna take as long as i want to get over it so please stuff yourself.
oh oh met up with deb the other day around dhoby cos i happened to be around the area haha it was so good to catch up with someone familiar. sigh really miss the feeling of having someone i know/who know me.
5 Oct 2014
two a.m. thoughts that i should probably keep to myself oops
i hate the way we ended. i ended it and i hate it and if there were a better way to do it i would go back and redo it but i guess that was the best i could do. i miss you.
i hate the way we started. who started it; me, you? does it matter anyhow. it was a bad start. it shouldn’t have started. not that it shouldn’t have started at all. it started at the wrong time at the wrong place in the wrong way (with the wrong person ? ). it was basically the worst start possible. and me sitting here at two a.m. typing away doesn’t rectify it but it does organise my mind a little. calm it down a little.
i hate the way i fail at everything. i’ve screwed up most of the things that matter to in life. i fail at life haha. haha.
maybe it’s my destiny in life to make bubble tea (it’s honestly really fun)
it’s scary, that i’ll probably never find another person who’d love me as much as you did (it’s also scary, how much you loved me, how did you do it)
me: our crushes aren’t cute ):
cy: it’s okay, as long as we’re cute :)
can somebody define love for me tyvm
things were a lot easier you know, when people around you weren’t getting drunk every other week or sleeping around or back stabbing others left right centre.
and i guess one day things will be alright but today is probably not the day
24 Sep 2014
considering my schedule and my progress with getting work done i think one post every fortnight is not bad luh, uh
last day of school today before recess week woohoo! desperately need the break to catch up on work (especially esp1107 ggxx). notes to be printed readings to be read tutorials to be done. although i might have committed 4/11 days to work and hall already oops. but it’s okay i can do this shit
also, made up my mind that whatever will come will come and whatever will be will be so there’s no point in thinking too much about it or forcing it. although i’m really hoping it’ll work but with so many people dissuading me….. we’ll see
excited for the next academic year hehe rag and camp and student life committees should be fun right i hope hahaha
1 star kayak course clashes with make up tutorial but i really wanna go ):
side note, i’m really really glad to be in engineering where girls are the minority so we don’t bother putting on the sweet and nice and fake face. the conversations i hear beside me when i’m at arts……. (generalising here but i’m really speaking from what i observe k. their pitch on average is like half an octave higher like please calm the f down)
okay now i feel slightly mean haha, but nonetheless, THANKFUL TO BE IN ENGINEERING.
19 Sep 2014
things are going bad but if i take a step back and count my blessings first, things don’t look that bad after all :)
hall is great haha i have friends and food 24/7 and maybe that’s all that matters
and have i mentioned friends. friends are a blessing and i have literally never been more thankful for the fact that i have friends. like they just brought the meaning of friends to a new level okay. how they support you when you mess up something. how they support you when others mess up something and you have to tank it. how they support you when the odds are against you. how they support you when you’re wasted and shit. i don’t see any reason they have to be there for me and i have no idea why they’re still there for me but i’m just glad that they are :> and no matter how shitty the first four weeks of uni have been, i’m glad that they showed me what friendship can be.
on a brighter note, i completed and handed in my first assignment as well as passed my first quiz in college (without studying for it) and may i just add that i’m mighty proud of myself (‘: (oh i also asked my first question in physics tutorial today #achievementunlocked )
a simple morning call from you, plain polaroid pictures with you make my day and i’m not sure how to feel about it that. would i get hurt going down this road? i’m thinking yes. but would i regret it if i took a step back? most definitely. perhaps you may cock up somewhere down the road and i’d end up being the one hurt but maybe all that matters is we had today (maybe)
can’t believe i’m calling jc days simple but compared to the shit that’s been going on recently, jc days were so so simple. can’t wait till our mini reunion hehe :3
and i guess after all, life still moves on
11 Sep 2014
waking up at 2am to complete assignments and staying awake till 8am lectures is something i guess i’ll get used to #ilovecollegelife #nonotreally
can’t wait till breakfast!!!!
in the meanwhile i come across depressing shit that people post at 4am hahaha oh wells
moving on and on and on
one day we’ll brush shoulders like strangers do
last day of week 4 and it seems like things are settling down :) although there’s a group presentation in a couple of weeks and a 1200 word essay due in 2 days (which i have not started on) oops
i should also do my laundry soon
caffeine intake has increased exponentially since i found out that starbucks downstairs is opened around the clock :)
i wanna go back and visit rwinds but i’m also forever occupied siannnn ):
still waiting for breakfast sobz food
considering switching workplaces haha like koi is fun and near and all but still need to travel. compared to utown starbucks heh. #lifedecisions
didn’t think i’d be involved in this kind of politics but in the spirit of fighting for what you want, i think it was worth it HAHA.
cocky ignorant shit
to go for noc or sep omg i need to make up my mind (to slack and travel and have fun or to do work and be productive) T.T
apologies for this incoherent pile of junk haha i haven’t done any sort of writing since forever thank you faculty of engineering
5 Sep 2014